Saturday, July 26, 2014

Orange Is The New Brandy

No. I'm not in prison. But I think I'm in love.
She's amazing, funny, smart, beautiful, and it's not a phase.
My Mom made me buy Sioned O'Connor instead of Spice girls. Is this why I'm gay? Or is it because I like Tegan And Sara before they were out of the closet. I can't believe I was ever in my closet...there are so many shoes in crowded....
I wanted to tell you long ago but you see I was afraid. And was in a dark place. But now I am living in a place full of soft kisses and hand holding and glitter and rainbows!
My girlfriend and I are on a crowded rooftop patio party. She touches my back and I smile at her. We kiss. In public! My friend lights up a joint on a heat lamp. The music is pumping- JayZ cause Beyonce is coming to town. We get super drunk and stumble home. I put on some Songza. Currently really into "Pacific Coast Highway Drive". Check it out guys.
Everyone at work knows I am dating a girl. And they don't give a damn. Welcome to the 21st century. Even my Dad knows! It's all good. I've lost 80 pounds of denial and guilt. I'm terrified to post this.
But I am who I am. This is who I am.


  1. I realize that you posted this some time ago, but I just want to let you know that I'm happy for you xx

  2. Hey there, not sure who you are but thank you. I hope life is treating you well!

  3. You posted this a few days after i came out to my parents. Well i just read it today and it was nice. It was different with me tho. I want to be out of the closet. i finally had the courage last july. But i guess the closet is locked from the outside. my parents and i never spoke about my sexuality ever again. They also told me not to share it at work cause thr people at work wont be in my life forever anyway. It is still a constant struggle. I know they know. But sometimes it seems like theyve declared it as a very bad dream.

    I cant even tell them about this girl i love. How we are together for over a year and shes from US and yes we are in ldr and crazy skype dates are all we have. I just hope for a day when my parents tell me they are so proud that im brave to fight for a love that is almost impossible to workout. That they are proud to have me regardless of my gender.

    They accepted me. Or maybe still in denial. All i know is that, it kinda breaks my heart when they said i cant hold my gf's hand in front of them cause it will hurt them so much.

    :( idk. hand to be locked from the outside.

  4. Hey there themindoftheidealist,
    That's rough man....rough. I'm sorry to hear your coming out was so bad. I am sure your parents love you unconditionally. Some people just take longer to accept things and to be comfortable with them. The nice thing about being a grown up is that you get to choose who you let in your life and there is a pretty big gay/gay accepting population in any city. You just have to find it. Personally I only spend time with people I find inspiring and positive. Try and fill your life with people like this and you might find the door was just jammed a bit. Your parents might just need a bit more time and once they see how happy and in love you are they will might come around. Give it time.
    I hope things work out for you and the girl you are with. Sounds like you guys have the real deal. You are lucky. Enjoy:)